A Lesson Learned
So often, we parents run to the aid of our children when they experience some form of discomfort or disappointment. But, who can blame us? Our role among other responsibilities is to provide and protect.
For the last two months, our eldest child has been working on a go-cart at school. Each student from fourth grade and younger gets a class called Work Period where they are given an opportunity to ideate and fully execute any project that can be realized with the materials in the Work Period room.
I have been hearing the progress reports from Operation Go Cart almost daily. Ila had concerns that she wouldn’t be able to finish it in time since she gets out of school next week, but she and her art teacher made a plan for it to be completed by Friday.
Two days ago was Friday and I already knew what my after school pick up fate would be — take an epically long walk home through Central Park with two children and this go cart.
In fact it took an epically long time to walk one avenue with this go cart, my bags, and their bags…13-minutes to be exact from Columbus Avenue to Central Park West.
Ila positions her pedal-less go cart to ride off into the sunset.
What we discovered as we maneuvered the cart down the street was that the nuts that were holding the wheels on the rod were not locking in a way that prevented them from falling off.
With each wheel revolution the wheels would make their way closer and closer to falling off and I kept thinking, “Why did they set my child up for failure like this? Why didn’t they think to buy locking nuts?!”
She had a big vision for how she wanted to drive into the sunset with this go-cart and it would not be realized today because of this engineering mishap.
Without ever revealing my true inner thoughts at any point through this experience, I soon realized the beauty in what was happening and the lessons to be learned for both of us.
13-minutes later, we prepare to embark on a ride through Central Park…only it took us 45-minutes to travel five blocks while in the park so I ended up hailing a cab because I had reached my limit.
My Lessons
Your child’s plans aren’t always going to go as planned. Don’t try to save them from disappointment. Letting them sit in disappointment and helping them navigate those feelings is better than shielding them from it.
Be comfortable with your child being uncomfortable. Discomfort builds problem solving skills, grit, and tenacity. These are all needed adults skills. Yes, you may have to hear them whine a little about how uncomfortable they are but it’s a small price to pay when they know how to weather the storm called life when they get older.
Ila’s Lessons that I’m Sure Won’t Fully Resonate for Another Decade of More 😩😆
Your plans aren’t always going to be executed perfectly every time you have an idea. In fact, that rarely happens. Welcome imperfection and embrace stick-to-itness.
When something you make doesn’t come out perfectly the first time, you iterate on the first version of your project and build from there. Rinse and repeat.
The success or failure of a project does not define you. You are still worthy no matter what.
As always, have a great week ahead.
Petrushka
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