Ambition for Friendship
This weekend, we traveled to Providence for my nephew’s graduation. A few weeks ago, my sister and I were here to see him perform with his Taiko drumming ensemble. This weekend, we all beamed with more pride for his accomplishments over the last four years.
One of the commencement speeches was titled “Ambitious about Friendship.” In my graduation card, I shared with my nephew that part of the mission of college, in addition to the obvious learning, is finding your people. I feel grateful that I found my closest friends in undergrad. We weren’t in the same departments but we met each other at all of the campus student events hosted at the beginning of our freshman year.
My nephew met his people in a similar way. He’s an introvert by nature but at the encouragement of my sister, he attended a student activities fair and joined his Taiko drumming ensemble. The community he joined has bar none been one of the highlights of his collegiate experience.
Family pic aka new phone wallpaper picture of us on the lawn of the First Baptist Church in Providence, RI right before my nephew performed with his drumming ensemble during the graduate procession
The student commencement speaker who addressed us earlier today talked about the power of friendship. She referenced Surgeon General Dr. Vivek Murphy’s work about loneliness being a national epidemic. Loneliness is a public health crisis.
Our connection to each other extends our life expectancy. But our aversion to being vulnerable with each other is the catalyst to our demise.
I will say until my last breath that there is nothing more important than our relationships to each other; they are what make the world go round.
If you’re living in a city or town where you don’t know a lot of people, join something; attend an event, volunteer to do something for someone, introduce yourself to someone new. Just opt in as much as you can.
If you’re in a place where you know people but don’t feel connected to them, challenge yourself to open up more. Challenge yourself to be vulnerable. Relationships cannot be cultivated without vulnerability. This is why I believe the beginning of motherhood is a beautiful time for forging new, very meaningful and long lasting friendships. There’s nothing like the sheer exhaustion of parenting for the first time to naturally demolish every protective emotional wall previously erected over the years leading into this chapter of life.
If you’ve been in the same place, hanging with the same people for a while, opt-in to some new activities. Open up your circle. Your future self will be grateful.
Tending to our relational gardens will ultimately give us more life.
Wishing you all a restful tomorrow. I hope you get to spend it with others.
Petrushka
Your Local Ice Cream Lady & Life/Business Coach