Gambling
Last June, I booked a childless trip for Nick and I to travel to Mexico…without a clear plan for who would be watching our kids. If you read last week’s email, you know that I am an advocate for deciding to decide. Let me offer some context as to what pushed me to move forward with this trip without having all the logistical details in place.
Last year at this time, we took a family trip to Montego Bay. If you’ve traveled with your kids without grandparents, aunties, uncles, or babysitters helping, you know your vacation is just you living your exact (if not more taxing) life in a different, possibly more beautiful setting. You are not on vacation. After that trip, I decided that it was time for Nick and I to get away for an actual vacation. We hadn’t taken an overnight trip without our kids since our honeymoon 12 years ago! So, last June I booked a parents-only trip for January 2024.
Us last year living our (just about) exact New York City life in a more beautiful Montego Bay, Jamaica
Before booking our flights, I called one of my best friend’s who has two kids and a business of her own to see if she could watch our kids. Our kids spend almost every waking hour together, so my request wasn’t too far fetched though this would be the longest amount of time that she would be watching our kids. Her “sure, that’s too far in advance to give you a confident yes” yes, was all I needed to move forward with this trip.
So many things have happened since I bought our tickets last June. We switched our childcare arrangement at least two or three times. Our finalized plan, which was confirmed days before we left for our trip included my friend, our other best friend, and our babysitter watching the kids.
What does this story have to do with making a decision to decide?
Nick and I in front of Frida Khalo's home
Images (L-R): Nick and I in front of the Palacio de Bellas Artes; an image of Diego Rivera's mural about capitalism versus socialism that was originally installed but eventually removed from the Rockefeller Center lobby in 1934; painting from the Pop, Político, Punk exhibition at the Museo de Arte Moderno; Nick in front of the Mexico City Metropolitan Cathedral
Making a decision to decide often requires radical action without a fully hatched plan. This can feel like gambling. It’s not. You’re just signaling to the universe that you are ready for change. If I had waited until I had an iron-clad childcare plan before booking tickets for this much needed time away, the trip would have never happened! Also, if we had waited to finalize all the details before deciding to open an ice cream shop that has turned into four ice cream shops with a catering arm, wholesaling arm, and nationwide distribution via Goldbelly, there would be no ice cream shop.
Often we get hung up on the "how" of what we want to do and don’t focus enough on the "what." The "what" is the vision for what we desire. Spend time creating your vision. What’s in the picture? Make a decision to decide on that "what;" that’s the most radical action you can take. Your "how" will take shape once you’ve committed to your radical action.
Working with a coach can sometimes be the radical act. Things get real once you’ve put some money behind taking action. Working with a coach also supports your "how." As an immensely resourceful person, big dreamer and executor, I’d love to help you plan your how. Let’s talk.
With love,
Petrushka
Your Local Ice Cream Lady & Life/Business Coach
P.S. If you are a SHMOM Alumnae, join us at our Lenox Avenue store next Saturday, January 20th from 9-10:30am for our annual kids clothes swap! The Eventbrite page says sold out, but there's no cap on attendance.
P.P.S. Welcome to all the new subscribers here and congrats to those of you have recently completed our Sugar Hill New Mom’s (SHMOMs) group. The next group starts on January 25th. Let a new mom in the Harlem area know.